What do you see when you look in the mirror?

 
It's a fact. Society gives girls and women messages that their body has to appear a certain way, youthful, slim, and without defect of any kind. Beauty products abound promising to give you eternal youth and beauty. Corporations build their fortunes on the low self-esteem of girls and women, who have been taught that unless they look like an airbrushed supermodel, they will never quite be enough.

The good news is that you don't have to look like Paris Hilton or Carrie Underwood to love your body as it is. Plus size women, women who have lost parts of their bodies to accident or surgery, women who suffer from chronic illness, or have any kind of perceived imperfection can all learn to love their bodies. In fact, even women who do meet society's ideals of beauty can have a difficult time accepting, appreciating, and loving their bodies, and can benefit from working on transforming their body image.

You can challenge society's dictates about what it takes to be a beautiful girl or lovely women in today's world. Please realize that society has a stake in making sure they continue to buy in to what they say you should look like. Large companies have millions of dollars at stake here, but you can challenge their harmful messages. You can make the choice to set your own standards of beauty, health, and well-being. Learning to love your own body is transformative and empowering.

Even if you are dissatisfied overall with your body image, perhaps there's something about your body you truly accept, and maybe even are proud of. You have beautiful hair? The winning smile?  Lovely breasts? Great skin? Start here. Notice what you love, or merely accept about your body today. It's a great starting point to learn to love and accept more and more of yourself.

Mindful eating is the way in which you can begin to transform your relationship to your body. Do you sit down at a table when you eat? Mindful eating involves sitting down at a table to eat your food, eating slowly, noticing the texture and flavor of your food, and putting down your fork or spoon between bites.

Take time to think about the ways in which your body serves you. Even if you are disabled, your body is a miracle. What abilities do you have? If you are healthy, you have so much to be thankful for. When is the last time you thanked your body for all that it does for you. Can you walk? Be thankful. Can you talk? Be grateful. Can you see? Give thanks.

What can you do this week to honor your body? Can you schedule a massage? Go for a walk and a lovely place? Spend some time journal writing about your body image? Engage in an activity you truly enjoy that honors your body.

If you live in Sonoma County and are seeking a licensed psychotherapist, please call me at (707) 522-0485. I look forward to hearing from you.

©2009, Katherine Kirk, MA, MFT, MFC46475
www.KatherineKirkMFT.com

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