Leaps & Bounds: Pathways to Success, LLC

Before we know it, it will be the New Year.  Sure, it's been a tough year economically for many.  Has your outlook been negative?  Are you looking for what's wrong?

In my opinion, the people who prosper in tough times are those who invest in themselves and continue to put their best foot forward.  Often when I ask people what is holding them back from greater success, they say it is them.  Many times, it is true.  Look for what need is ready to be filled.  How you can best serve others?  How you can increase your satisfaction in your home, work life and improve the world we live in?  Previously, I spoke about making a journal.  It can be very revealing. Watch your passion and enthusiasm increase when you are where you are meant to be.

As some bright mind once said - make a plan & work your plan.  Going on day-to-day in the same manner may not be the best plan for you.  Even if it is necessary to stay in a job you are at currently, plan what your future will be and take small steps towards it.

My assignment for you: Define the goals you want to reach in the next 3-5 years.  Divide them into small steps. Put a deadline on each step so you know what action to take to get there on the designated date.  Be true to your deadlines.  If some of your day is spent with repetitive, mundane work, know you are taking steps towards your goal.  Be committed to it.  This is your life.

If you are not sure about the steps, get help from a friend, mentor or coach.  If it is helpful,let me hear from you - ellen@leapsandboundscoaching.com.  Make 2010 a turning point for you.

So many of us look at what we don't do well or "perfectly".  No one on Earth that we know about is entirely "perfect".  Why put that expectation on yourself?  Look at your strengths.  What can you do to grow them?  Rather than having "weaknessses", think of them as lesser strengths (for example, I could say math is a weakness.  I do have some abilities in that area, but it is not my high point.  So it is a lesser strength.). 

Think of what you have, give thanks for your blessings and develop yourself.  Enjoy your life.  It is too short.  Spread your sunshine and smiles and watch others smile in return. 

Now more than ever, be easier on yourself, develop your talents, smile and focus on your goodness. Learn what you can do to be at the top of your game so you even have more to give.  You can help change the world.

I just got off a client call.  One person spoke how she would never write a journal.  Another spoke up on how it helps him.  He is writing in journals for over 10 years.  He sees how he has grown, how the problems of the day change and how the importance of what he got so upset about at one time is a faint memory if one at all.  Knowing as Og Mandino and others said "this too shall pass" allows us to get perspective.  What takes on great importance and hurt one day can disappear from memory.  Knowing it will pass enables one to take more things in stride and realize tomorrow is a new day.  Do we want to ruin the rest of this day and days that follow when we won't even remember a lot of what upsets us today.  Yes, take care of the problem as best you can and move on.  Enjoy your life and the people in it.  Watch more success and happiness come you way.  Try journalling (it's been reported that writing it out rather than typing it is a better method - it reaches more of our senses I believe).  Looking forward to hearing what you discover.

·  Are We There Yet?

When I was a child, my family took regular road trips about an hour away. "Are we there yet?" I would ask, over and over again as Dad steered the car down the highway. An hour can seem like a lifetime to a kid. As adults, progress can seem to be made as slowly as the road trip that took forever. Are you where you thought you would be at this time in your life? Are you further ahead?  Anyone where they expected to be?   Aim high enough? How does that feel? -Do you look at people who are more successful than you? -What is stopping you?  What would it be like to really know? -Do you have what you thought you would? -Are you who you thought you would be? -Where you are and what you have are natural outcomes of who you are. -Ever feel like the movie “Ground Hog Day”?  Every day is the same thing – every New Years, you may wonder why and just keep on going like the "Energizer Bunny".  Who you are is determined by how you think. You can examine your thinking patterns, determine which ones are supporting your success and learn to leverage those and discover which ones sabotage you and how to make productive changes based on your strengths rather than doing battle with your weaknesses. Change your thoughts/change your actions/get different results. This time next year, will you still be wondering when you'll "get there" or will you "be" where and what you desire? What will life be like if you do nothing about that? What would it be like if you increase your business and improve relationships soon? Take on your thoughts and make clearer decisions.  Looking forward to leading you in that direction.  The commitment to make it happen needs to come first from you. Email me to find out how (ellen@leapsandboundscoaching.com) and/or come back to this site often to hear more.  You deserve it.

 

Are you ready to create more success and happiness?  Do you yearn for deeper relationships, better connections with clients and peers?

Are you feeling something is missing?  Are you doing OK but not close to what you expect?  Does that bring you down? 

One needs to connect with one's thought processes.  We have six dimensions of thought.  Some of them support you to getting where you want to go.  Others do not.  Imagine what being in greater connection with your personal strengths (that will lead to your brilliance) will do for your life! 

I had a client who wanted to take on different marketing strategies.  She didn't seem to do the work necessary to make changes in her business & get her employees involved.  She took one of the assessment I offer and then the three-month program and wow!  She became more disciplined, took on the structure needed for success, built thoughts processed that enhanced her self esteem, and enjoyed the transformation which was sometimes exhilarating, sometimes a bit rocky.  Her business grew and relationships flourished.

When I ask people what is standing in their way of greater success, I often hear from them "me".  Be your own best friend.  Enjoy your life.  You are worth it.

Contact me to learn more and/or comment on what thoughts came up for you while reading this.  Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Ellen

"Do you know someone that you would like to change and improve?

Good! That is fine. I am all in favor of it. But why not begin on
yourself? From a purely selfish standpoint, that is a lot more profitable
than trying to improve others – and a lot less dangerous."

Criticizing others rarely does any good because people are not
creatures of logic, they are creatures of emotion. Very rarely will you
criticize someone and hear them respond with "Why thank you, I see you are
correct and I shall improve immediately."

No, criticism is a dangerous spark that usually brings out every
unbalanced Advisor (thoughts in your head) the other person has. When we feel attacked

(which is what being told you are wrong feels like), we usually respond in one of two
ways, 1) with hurtful emotion or 2) defensive anger. Neither of which is
productive in the least.

Can you remember a time when someone criticized you? Do you remember
how you REACTED? Did their criticism do any good? Did it inspire you to
improve? Probably not, it rarely does. How do you feel about that person
today?

As parents, we often stumble and destroy good lessons for our children
by criticizing them for their mistakes. In so doing, we create anger and
hurt directed at us, instead of letting the natural consequences of the
mistake teach the lesson.

Benjamin Franklin said his secret to success was to" speak ill of no
man and speak all the good I know of everybody." This is a good policy.

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain – and most fools do. But
it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. It
is also a much smarter way to live.

Instead of criticizing, try stepping into another person’s world. Ask
them questions, find out where they are and how they feel about an issue.
Validate them as a human being by caring about what they think and feel.
As you question, you may learn things about this person which explains
the problem. You may then, have the opportunity to show up for them (not to
advise or fix them) but offer to show up for them in a different way.

This approach will lead to more solutions, improvements and change than
any amount of criticism ever could.

Now what about when someone criticizes you? You will feel the
reaction, as they trigger those Advisors in you, to defend yourself. Don’t
do it. Step back.

From a safer perspective, you should be able to see that this person
owns this problem (it is about them – not you). See this criticism as a
door into their world, instead of as an attack on you. This is a wonderful
opportunity to walk through that door into their world and find out what is
really going on. Instead of defending yourself, ask them "Tell me why you
feel that way?"

Let them get it out. Ask more questions, find out how they feel and
where these perceptions of theirs have come from. Make sure that they feel
heard and understood. (This does not mean you agree with them – This does
not mean you will give them their way) It means that you will validate them
as a person with the right to feel the way they do. You will let them feel
heard.

From here you can work on a solution to strengthen the relationship.
Whenever you are on either end of criticism – ask yourself what
your highest best self would do. Treat others as you would be treated.

Excerpts from University of Success Lesson 31 – Og Mandino

Copyright 2009, All Rights Reserved, Ellen Cahill, M.A., Six Advisors Consultant, www.leapsandboundscoaching.com – 215-355-6316 (phone)